the only nation i will ever rule is procrastination
following back everyone until i find a tumblr gf♡
girl: *is cute *
me : OHh mygod oh my god do that again
Fuck I’m walking downtown and I pass a group of guys staring at me and I think “great catcall time” but then one guy goes “you look like you could kill a man a million different ways with just your bare hands”. This. This is an acceptable comment to give a girl on the street.
basically my life can be summed up in alternating periods of Linda Belcher’s “Alriiiiight!” and Bob Belcher’s “Oh my god”
sorry kids you’re either going to have to get a job or go to uni
oh but uni’s probably going to cost you more so you’ll need to do both
also we don’t have enough jobs for you
*flicks holy water on you* leave
it’s sad when you realize you aren’t as important to someone as you thought you were.
watching yourself being replaced by people better than you